These Pieces of My Heart

It's just little pieces of my heart ripped apart
so tired of your excuses and I want a new start
So many times I've left words just left unsaid
curtains drawn, not gettin' out of bed

I hold out my hand and reach for more
should've learned by now your words cut to the core
Can someone really explain why I keep holdin' on
to this love that's been long gone

I've lost so much more than you were able to give
and want to release this pain and just live
These tears I've cried a little each day
as my inner peace and grace fade away

Some tell me to stand tall, stand strong
no matter the abuse or the wrong
To lift up my head and take it in stride
and let the world see what I hide

I'm thinking of things locked away in my mind
painful words and actions you won't see or find
So just taking my time thinking things through
as the years fade away and your words too few

There are those who tell me don't waste another day
to walk out, not look back and give it all away
Seventeen years of never giving up
as these memories fill my life's cup

Swept back into this memory of time
while my grandfather clocks melodies chime
My heart and soul, beautiful yet stained
as my body feels forever chained.


(this poem i wrote recently dealing with my own feelings as i struggle in my marriage and try to fight the fear and doubts that are so hard to forget..giving it all to GOD for it is the only thing left i can do.)

Oh, How Beautiful You Are

Creator, Redeemer
Mighty GOD
Oh, how beautiful You are

Need You now
My heart beats for You

Jesus, Son of GOD
broken upon the cross

You alone are worthy
Keeper of my heart

I'm overcome
Made new in You

Want You with me
Mighty King draw near

Show me the way
My trust lies in You

Creator, Redeemer
Mighty GOD
Oh, how beautiful You are

Come Back
Bring me home

Nothing left to hide
On my knees before you

Your mercy, grace
The promise You gave

I lift up my hands
Sing, dance, give praise

Nothing compares to You
In this big wide world

You are my glory
The only One worthy

Creator, Redeemer
Mighty GOD
Oh, how beautiful You are

Fill my senses
Yearning again

A thirst for life
A hunger for love

Open my heart
Carry me to the end

Jesus, Son of GOD
Lamb of sacrifice

You healed me
You are all I need

Creator, Redeemer
Mighty GOD
Oh, how beautiful You are
Oh, how beautiful You are
You are beautiful to me

Beautiful, Blinding You

Beautiful, blinding You
make my heart Yours
Your breath sweet as wine
let me taste life

Your love
Your heart to mine
You are greater
You are better
Your glory shines

Beautiful, blinding You
make me crave You
Your arms strong and gentle
let me thirst for You

Your ways
Your will bending mine
You are greater
You are better
Your glory shines

Beautiful, blinding You
make me cry only for You
Your tears fall like diamonds
drowning my sin away

Your grace
Your mercy saved me
You are greater
You are better
Your glory shines

Beautiful, blinding You
make my life Yours
Your love surrounds me
it caresses me

Your Glory
Your sacrifice mine
You are greater
You are better
Your glory shines

Your My Bride, My Child

Where will you hide?
Why do you run?

I'm holding out My hands
see these scars my child

I love you daughter
your My bride
so when you walk on by
leaving Me behind
remember why I cry

My hands reach out to you
bringing you close by My side

I died to save you
a tie binding you and I

I love you daughter
your My bride
so when you walk on by
leaving Me behind
remember why I cry

Put your trust in Me
and watch your life change

I've set you free
just to be with Me

I love you daughter
your My bride
so when you walk on by
leaving Me behind
remember why I cry

I love you daughter
your My bride

I love you daughter
your My child

Paralyzed

Paralyzed...
trapped beneath this fear
that took ahold

so tired of feeling like this
my light went out inside

Don't wanna be all alone
take hold of my hand
surround me with Your life

Paralyzed...
i ran so far from You
fear took hold
wouldn't let go

so tired of feeling like this
my light went out inside

Don't wanna sleep alone
waking up to You
heart and soul
so real so true

Why did I ever doubt you?
tempted aside by
golden lies
needing You now

Save me now
pull me close
by Your side
Hold on tight

Paralyzed...
till Your with me again
needing You near
holding my hand

so tired of feeling like this
my light went out inside

Nothing left to lose
nothing to prove
not ready to die
till Your with me
once again

It's all crashed
broken, shattered
laying before You now
my life, my love,
my heart, my soul

I need You
near my heart
i'm breathing life
living in love

Take my hand
pull me through
save me now
paralyzed..
no more

Hear Me Scream

I strike out in pain
done lost control
battle wounds open wide

this demon's bled me dry
buried me in hate and rage
going out o' my mind

secrets deep within
so twisted inside
feelings dead
no escape now

Hear me scream
screaming out for YOU

heart so scarred
a rage i can't hide
mayhem, confusion
wrap around in my mind

this demon's in my mind
deep down within
hiding in the dark
lurking inside

satan played me
blinded me to truth
i lost control
its' not me
not me

Hear me scream
screaming out for YOU

Bring Me Home

I'm standing on this rock
waitin' for you, on my own
the dark surrounds me
reaching out my arms
why aren't you there?

My eyes no longer see
my ears no longer hear
your footsteps so silent
there's nothing but my crazed mind
cry'n to this dark unknown

It's so cold, I'm all alone
try'n to figure out
where it all went so wrong

Pull me back
bring me home
no longer know
who I am

Something inside of me
longing to be free
needing the truth
in my confusion
slowly goin' out of my mind

It's so cold, I'm all alone
try'n to figure out
where it all went so wrong

Pull me back
bring me home
no longer know
who I am

Thought you'd be by my side
with every breath
and each step

Standin' here arms spread wide
pray'n it will be alright

Set This World On Fire

Time seems to reveal deep in me
wounds that quite didn't heal
break down these stone walls
that surround my heart, set me free

Yahweh, come take away this pain
build a new me that's in You
let's set this world on fire

I've waited so long for someone to help me back up
on bended knee I reach out for Your cup
begging sweet, mercy please
while watching as he leaves


Yahweh, what was your cost to save me?
did it hurt to watch Your son upon the cross?
knowing He gave up all of Himself
so He could save me from myself

Nothing in this world that I touch and see
has been any good for me
so many pebbles in my way
rocks that I stumbled upon
as I knelt to pray

I strayed off that narrow road leading to You
one to many times, lost, and so alone
messed up my life more times
than I care to admit

Take my hand my King
walk me through Your cleansing fire
hold me tight for I am weak
where You are strong

Yahweh, come take away this pain
create in me a new heart
let's set this world on fire

Gonna set this world on fire
singing your beautiful name, my Yahweh
lift my hands up in praise to You

My burden seemed more than I could bear
feeling a thirst, a sweet longing care
lost in this desert all alone
fighting with words rushing through my mind

When will You come and rescue me
for so long my tears have fallen in this sea
your all I can see right now
as my world comes crashin' down

Yahweh, come and restore my soul
build a new me that's in You
help me set this world on fire

Tried to bury it all deep inside
then You came in and washed it all out
doesn't seem right to me
that You had to die to bring me alive

No where to turn among all these people
as my hands reached out asking please, oh please
watching their heads turn away
pretending they don't see

Yahweh, dance with me
sing to me all about Your life
let's set this world on fire

Bittersweet memories tickle my mind
can't change what is to come, i'm no longer blind
your will be done in heaven and earth
while the angels sing gloriously to me

Now I see, now I hear
with Your eyes, your ears
your heart, your tears

Yahweh, hold me ever so tight
now fill me up with Your love
come cleanse me with holy fire
fill me to overflowing from above

Give me Your voice to shed some light
to those who walk by my side
bringing hope and joy
in You I pray they humbly abide

Yahweh, let's dance and sing tonight
Your beautiful name burns so bright
Yahweh, my Yahweh
Yahweh, my Yahweh
let's set this world on fire

No One but You

Jesus, You are my life
Creator, my delight
No one else but You

no one but you
no one but you
no one but you, Jesus

By grace You saved me
Made my heart new
I belong only to You

I'm yours now
I'm yours now
I'm yours now, Jesus

There's no other Jesus
You are King of me
I follow as You lead

I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You, Jesus

Hold Me Father

Rains flood my mind
storms rage all around
lost in my dreams
once again

Hold me again Father
keep me from falling
am I all alone
cant say what I want to say


My heart is trapped
damaged, broken
from his hate and rage
my love stolen away

Hold me again Father
keep me from falling
am I all alone
cant say what I want to say

Is it only begun
or does time stand still
do I go on from here
finding a way through the fire

Hold me now, Lift me high
Hold me now, Lift me so high

Believe in love
everlasting, holding
so forevermore

Hold me again Father
keep me from falling
am I all alone
cant say what I want to say

Hold me now, Lift me high
hold me now, lift me so high

You Let Me Shine

V1: My fight is over now
brought down to my knees
bits and pieces
all broken before You

CH: You hold me so tight
You lift me so high
You love me

V2: This world so hard
cold as ice
my pain opened
before Your eyes

CH: You let me shine
you let me shine

V3: Words of hate
racism satans playground
wars kill many so loved
the blood runs deep

CH: You let me shine
you let me shine

V4: Calamity abounds
this one hides the bruises
many small hands out
while this one cries

CH: You hold me so tight
You lift me so high
You love me

V5: Darkness spreads out
hunger burns in the night
disease killing young and old alike

CH: You let me shine
you let me shine


V6: That day come soon
your love chosen long ago
to save us, bind us
to home in heaven

CH: You let me shine
you let me shine


(I pray it is You that shines within me loving all You created, full of humility and grace, sharing Your love with all I meet)

Your Word

V1: You fill my heart up
it overflows now
my longing is yours

CH: Your word is my vow
to cherish, store up
and spread around

V2: All of heaven sings to You
I hear the angel's song
upon the whispers in the wind

CH: Your word, my light
living among us
hands cherishing
all those around

V3: Father, my King
walk with me now
hand in hand

CH: Your word is my vow
to cherish, store up
and spread around

V4: I hear Your voice
deep in my sleep
forever with me

CH: Your word, my light
living among us
hands cherishing
all those around

V5: Show me the way
to carry on
loving those
like you've loved me

CH: Your word is my vow
to cherish, store up
and spread around

V6: Rain or shine
anywhere You are
I want to be

CH: Your word, my light
living among us
hands cherishing
all those around

V7: Spring flowers fade
golden rays shine
leaves crimson and orange
sparkling white dusts the ground

CH: Your word is my vow
to cherish, store up
and spread around

(this song written recently gave me something to hold onto, to remember that He is always there for me)

Jeweled Dreams

Gliding effervesently
through this watery
grave so low

Memories stir
A fateful sigh

Gone are the rubies
gone are the pearls

Diamonds dangling
along the coral reef
glimmer and shine

Memories stir
A fateful sigh

will you ever
be mine

(wow, nearly forgot about this silly thing...it was written when i first fell in love with my husband over a decade ago...kind of a girly silly poem but hey, when those feelings are all jumbled up inside my thing to do is write, and write and write)

Dreams Come True

Your first breath I heard
an angel say in my ear

Don't cry my child
no need for this fear.

Your daughter is here
to bring you years of cheer.

My baby girl
momma's dream
came true

I looked upon you
so tiny, so fragile
adorable and cute

I vowed then and there
you would be around
long after I was gone

My baby girl
momma's dream
came true

(i wrote this in 95' after our son was born while still in the hospital, as was there for 2 weeks. this was written about our daughter as giving birth to another premature baby brought back all the memories of when i gave birth to her premature and watched as she came from my womb not breathing and holding my own breath until the doctor's finally put her in my arms after working on her for a little bit, this small story is of what i felt and heard after her birth)

Goin' to love you a long time

V1: Baby blue eyes smilin up at me
an angel from above
Your tiny hands reaching upward
they grab onto me.

CH: Momma's goin to love you
baby, a long time from now.

V3: Just turned one today
your smile so big and
I see your daddy in you

V4: His smile, his nose
his ears you have
and a laughter that
makes your momma proud

CH: Momma's going to love you
baby, a long time from now

V5: Two' you couldn't be
Just look at you
Walking and talking
And into everything

V6: Your hugs uplift me
Your kisses bedazzle me
Such a young man now
and going to be three

CH: Momma's going to love you
baby, a long time from now

V7: Off to school
Just look at what
you can do now

V8: Still my angel from above
with your baby blue's
smilin up at me

CH: Momma's goin' to love you
baby, a long time from now


(this song was written when malachai, our son, was a toddler on one of those many nights i held him in my arms close to my heart, listening to his breathing, smelling his sweet scent that is unique to him, and the softness of his little hands as they grabbed ahold of mine. i treasure all of these memories.)